He Wasn't Even A Boy! - Final Chapter One

 

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Disclaimer: All characters depicted in this story are 18 years of age or older at the time of the events described. This work is intended for a mature audience and complies with all applicable content guidelines regarding age-appropriate material. It is purely fictional and intended for entertainment purposes only. The content is not meant to promote or endorse any real-life actions. Reader discretion is advised. Enjoy responsibly within the context of fantasy.

We stayed in that embrace for what seemed like hours. We were both laughing, crying, and smiling together. 

There were no words, and no need for them. It was almost as if we could sense each other's very souls.  Finally, with expressions of delight, we packed up and returned home.  I was in a dream-like state for the rest of the day. What had happened back at the glade had been an epiphany of sorts, a realization of the profound implications of my girlhood. 

And even more, how that connected me to all the women who'd come before me.  I could have a baby.  

No, I didn't want to run off and buy a bunch of maternity clothes. It was the potential... the possibility... of becoming a mother that amazed me. Girls grow up from infancy knowing this and accepting it as a matter of fact. 

But for me, who'd spent his youth as a boy, the novelty of the concept was profound.  And I liked it.  It was at this point that I realized I didn't really want to go back to being male. 

If a cure for GB were found, I'd almost certainly turn it down. Much like Erin at Girl School, I still missed some parts of my previous life, but I'd come to enjoy this gift of girlishness in a way I never could have imagined before.  But all good things must come to an end. 

The next few days at school were fun as I expected. My status as a minor celebrity wound down quickly, and a state of normalcy returned. Schwarzenegger's candidacy for governor drove my story off the CNN headlines, which was perfectly fine for me. 

I went to class, wrote my papers, hung around with my circle, and worked out at the track. The team was preparing for the district and sectional championships, although each ladder weeded out a few more members. Still, we were probably going to send at least a half-dozen athletes to the state meet. 

I wouldn't be able to compete, of course, as a result of Oxton's scheming, but the end of the season still beckoned me: the Nationals. Thanks to my court ruling, I was still eligible for that one, so I continued to train hard.  It was after one of my practices that it happened. 

I'd finished changing back into my street clothes and said goodnight to Becky. I was walking down the deserted corridor when I noticed a utility room door that was open a few inches. 

Curious, I walked a little closer, when suddenly rough hands seized me and pushed me into the room. 

A firm punch to the base of my skull made me see stars. The door was slammed shut behind me, and my hands were swiftly bound and tied around a pipe, forcing me into a seated position. It all happened so fast, I didn't even have time to scream. 

Heart pounding, I raised confused eyes to see what was happening.  I really shouldn't have been surprised to see Andy Marks.  As usual, he was accompanied by his gruesome twosome. Today, let's call them Uday and Qusay. They stood behind him while he stared down at me with a malevolent smile.  

"Well, well. Little Miss Lind. I told you this day was coming. Now it's finally time for us to get to know each other better."  

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Marks?" 

 "That should be obvious, girl. Someone needs to put you in your place, and I'm just the guy to do it."  

"You've lost it, Marks. Untie me before you get into more trouble." I was trying to be brave, but my pulse was racing. I struggled not to look afraid.  

"Back when you were Jack, I knew you didn't have what it takes to be a real man. And now that you're Stephanie, you've proven it. I've watched you flouncing around in those cute little outfits of yours, finally acting like the pussy you always were on the inside. 

You dressed like that for me... because you want this," he said, gesturing towards his crotch.  "Fuck off, Marks." But my bravado was on a razor's edge. I knew what could happen in this room, and I was growing terrified.  

"Very appropriate way to put it, Stephanie. There will be some fucking, but I won't be alone. Let's just run down the story here. I know you dress like a girl. I know you've got a boyfriend. And I know you've had your period. 

There's really only one thing left for you to experience to complete your journey. And here is where it's going to happen, little bitch."  He stepped forward and, with one swift motion, ripped open my blouse. I was wearing my classic schoolgirl outfit, with the pleated skirt and all the rest. 

The sudden violation of my space shocked me into silence. 

My bra was exposed, my chest heaving as I struggled against my bonds.  "Not bad, Stephanie. But let's see what you've been hiding all this time." And with that, he reached for the front clasp and literally tore my bra off. And for the first time, a boy (three of them!) saw my breasts. I flushed red with shame, having long ago developed the feminine modesty compelling me to conceal my torso.  

There were expressions of sheer lust on their faces as they drooled over my body. I'd been proud of my breasts in the girls' locker room, but now I was reeling from the embarrassment of having them on my chest. I suddenly found myself yearning for the masculinity forever lost to me.  

After a few moments, I began to gather my wits and was about to plead for my release when suddenly Mark pulled a knife out and waved it near my face. "If you speak, girl, it will be the last thing you ever say." I froze in place.  

At that, Uday and Qusay seemed uneasy. One spoke. "Uh, listen, man, I thought we were just going to scare her a little."  

"Shut the fuck up. If I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you. This little cunt is going to get what she deserves."  He turned back to me, slowly taking in my bare breasts with a dark smile on his face. "Nice, nice rack, girlie. But let's see what else you've got." 

I could barely swallow as his hands went to the hem of my skirt, slowly, ever so slowly, raising it up my smooth thighs.  

Unlike when he ripped my blouse open, he drew this motion out, demonstrating the control, the power he had. I was acutely aware of the knife; it wasn't very big, but it was all too intimidating.  

I didn't dare resist as he lifted my skirts still higher, inch by inch. My legs were nearly completely bare now as he torturously exposed my body. And then he raised the skirt all the way to my hips, revealing my panties. I was wearing a pastel blue nylon pair today, with cute little butterflies. His leer grew still greater as all three boys in the room drank in the sight of my female sex, well defined and barely concealed by my pretty underpants.  

I suddenly felt a sense of rage unlike any before. They had no right, no RIGHT to see me like this! My body was for me and whoever I chose to share it with. 

And no one else. My panties were for my enjoyment, not for some hypersexed asshole like Andy Marks.  The combination of expressions on his hated face grew more intense. Desire, lust, and... 

That mysterious something I'd spotted before was back. What the hell was it? What did he really want from me?  

Later for that. My anger swelled as I found common ground with every woman and girl who'd ever been assaulted by a man. That combination of complete helplessness and utter violation produced an emotional volcano within me. I swear, if I'd had a gun at that moment, I could have shot all three of them.  

Gritting my teeth, I raised my voice as he reached to yank off my panties. 

"Don't touch me, you motherfucker."  He raised the knife. "I told you not to speak, girl."  "I don't care. Cut me to ribbons if you wan,t but I'd rather die than have you lay another hand on me." 

And with that, I took a deep breath in preparation for my first scream.  I meant it. And he could tell. My anger was helping me to find the strength I didn't know I had. 

A look of uncertainty crossed his features. Was he really ready to hurt me? I was about to find out as I yelled for help.  I didn't expect anyone to come, of course. The cavalry always arrives in time in Hollywood, but here in Milford, there was no director to cue the hero.  Nevertheless, he came anyway. 

Hal burst into the room and took in the scene. I, tied to a steam pipe, my blouse and bra ripped open, my breasts bare, my skirt hiked up to my waist, my panties in full view.  And Marks, standing over me with a knife in his hands. It wouldn't take anyone long to figure this one out. 

Hal roared and charged into Marks, knocking him down and sending the knife flying. Marks was flat on his back as Hal began to rain blows down onto him.  Unfortunately, he'd moved so quickly that he hadn't seen Uday and Qusay. 

They may have been reluctant participants, but they were in this all the way now. They pulled Hal off of Marks, holding him back as Marks got off the ground and retrieved the knife.  

"Well, well. The gallant boyfriend arrives to save the day. How romantic." He slammed a fist into Hal's stomach, making him bend over in the old, old reaction. Another punch, this time to the head, left Hal dazed and semiconscious.  

"Leave him alone, you bastard, or I'll..." I snapped.  

"You'll what? What can you do to me, little bitch? You're small and weak, just like all girls. I could break you in half without even trying. You're female, Stephanie, which makes you inferior to any guy." 

 I struggled furiously against my bonds, cursing my slender arms and delicate chest. In that sense, he was right. I could not stand up to him even if I were untied; he could utterly dominate me physically. It was so unfair! Why did women have to be so fragile? I found myself resenting the very femininity that I'd celebrated just a few days before.  

"So now, at last, you understand. You're just a little girl, soft and pretty and helpless. Which is exactly what you should be, anyway. That's all that girls are for, to live for the pleasure of men."  He raised the knife to Hal's face. 

"You said you'd rather die than have me touch you. Are you prepared to see your boyfriend take your place?" 

 "No... don't hurt him," I begged.  

"Then you'll cooperate."  "Ye... yes." I stammered.  

"Then first, tell me what you are."  Confused, I just looked at him.  An expression of fury came across his face. "You're a girl!" he shouted. Jesus, he really was insane.  "I'm... I'm a girl." I repeated, trying to keep him calm.  "You're nothing but a horny little bitch."  

A deep breath. "I'm a... horny little... bitch."  

"You can't wait for me to fuck you, to show you what it means to be a woman."  They were just words. So why was I so ashamed? But I played along. 

"I can't wait for..." I paused.  

"Finish it!" he shouted again, putting the knife against Hal's cheek.  

"I can't wait for you to fuck me." When this was over, I was going to dig a nice, deep hole and crawl into it.  It was clear that Marks was tipping over the edge. Uday and Qusay were obviously scared. But Marks had the knife, and whatever hold he had over them was very strong.  

I suppose if I'd been really sophisticated, I would have gone into some, "Oh, Andy, you're so manly... You make it so hard for a girl to say no... I can't resist you, etc." It would have bought me some time and maybe given Hal a chance to recover. 

I tried to work up my courage, but I could hardly stomach the idea. 

 "Those are cute panties you're wearing, Stephanie. I'm not surprised to see you in the frilly stuff you were born for. But as adorable as you look in those panties, I'd bet you'd look even better without them."  

Once again, Marks strode across the room to me, and once again prepared to yank off my pretty underpants.  And once again, the door burst open, this time revealing the massive form of Big Mark Williams (BMW), all six feet six and 260 pounds of him.  

For a moment, the half-dozen of us were frozen, taking in the tableau. Uday and Qusay reacted first, dropping Hal and rushing at the huge young man.  Big mistake. Almost casually, he reached out with two massive arms, caught each of them in a hand, and knocked their heads together. 

They passed out cold on the floor. Hal struggled to his feet as Andy Marks slowly edged toward BMW, brandishing the blade. Marks was clearly scared as he saw his buddies unconscious, but he wasn't backing down.  

BMW didn't even bother with any gestures of bravado. He just stood there, waiting for Marks to make his move. Marks attempted to lunge forward, but BMW moved with surprising speed, stepping to the side and then chopping down on his outstretched arm. 

The knife went spinning across the floor, and BMW backhanded Mark across the face. Andy fell to his knees in a daze.  Hal rushed over to me and quickly untied me. 

My first reaction was utterly feminine. I pulled the shreds of my blouse together and covered my breasts. My second reaction was also feminine I started to cry as the terror of the moment faded, and I had the luxury of acknowledging my emotions.  

Hal held me tightly as BMW came over to us. They both anxiously asked me if I was all right.  

"Yes, thanks to you two." I raised my tear-stained face to the boys and gathered them both into my arms. Still crying, I told them how grateful I was. "If it hadn't been for you guys, I... I..." I left it unfinished; it was obvious what would have happened. 

"How did you find me, anyway?"  Hal spoke. 

"I was walking down the hall and I spotted your purse. You must have dropped it when they dragged you in here. I could hear people talking behind the door, so I stopped. Then I heard you scream."  Saved by my purse. I had to smile. Becoming female had made me a target for Marks, but I'd been rescued by that same femininity. "You too?" I queried BMW.  

"Yep. I saw both your purse and Hal's gym bag as well."  "God bless you both," I said, hugging them tightly.  Marks groaned and began to rise. A murderous look appeared on Hal's face, and he turned to my would-be assailant.  

"No," I said, grabbing his arm.  "You've got to be kidding, Stephanie. Jesus, he nearly..."  "I know, Hal, but I have other plans for him."  

"I assume you're going to report him to the police," BMW said.  

"Nope. I've had enough of courtrooms lately. I've got something else in mind."  Hal spoke again. "Stephanie, there's no way he can be allowed to walk away from this."  

I stood my ground. "I agree he will pay a price. But only on my terms. Trust me, guys, I know what I'm doing."  

Hal looked closely at me, then nodded slowly. "Okay then. But if he ever..."  BMW cut in. 

"This part I'll handle." He walked over to Marks and, with one hand, grabbed his shirt and lifted him six inches off the ground. Marks had a fearful expression. Good.  

Then BMW began to speak. "She's given you a reprieve, asshole. But understand something, I'm not so forgiving. If you so much as speak to her again, or look at her cross-eyed, or ever, EVER lay a hand on her, I will bury you. 

Literally."  BMW had a reputation as an easy-going guy, but there was a look of such power and determination on his face, even Stallone would have been cowed. I could see Mark begin to shake, still dangling in his grasp.  BMW continued. 

"Pray for her good health, Mark, because if anything ever happens to her, I'll be coming for you. It won't matter if it's not your fault. It won't matter if she says to back off. Nothing will protect you from me. And when I'm done, it'll take you years just to learn how to walk again."

 He growled the last with fierce authority, then he threw Marks across the utility room to land atop Uday and Qusay. 

 All three of us left the space and walked back to Hal's car. I was still struggling to keep my shredded blouse together. Fortunately, there was no one else around. I wasn't afraid of either of these guys seeing my breasts. I know this sounds silly and arrogant, but they'd earned the right to peek. I gave a final hug to BMW, then Hal drove me home.  

I was silent during the ride, reflecting on all that had happened. Hal kept giving me looks of concern. 

When we arrived, he turned off the ignition and faced me. There were tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry, Stephanie... 

If the big guy hadn't shown up..."  I knew what was going on; I remembered from my own boyhood. There was a male imperative that a man was supposed to protect his woman, and Hal felt he'd failed me.  

I smiled at him. "But you did save me, Hal. If you hadn't tackled him when you did, he wouldn't have stopped in time. You bought us the chance we needed. In all my life, I was never so glad to see anyone as when you opened that door. I  know I can count on you. 

You're... you're my knight, my prince..."  Corny, yes. But that's how I saw him. We hugged again, both of us crying. Then I kissed his cheek and raced inside.  

Fortunately, Mom wasn't home. I knew I could get BMW and Hal to back off on my request, but if Mom learned what happened, she'd be dialing 911 in seconds. I wanted to deal with Marks my own way.  

Make no mistake about it, I was outraged and furious over what he'd tried to do. Aside from the horror of the experience (and I knew I'd be having nightmares), there was something else I hated about it all.  

He'd made me resent my own femininity.  He'd done to me what had been done to so many other women, forced me to regret my girlhood, made me wish I were a man so I couldn't be vulnerable to him. 

So I wouldn't be so damn small and weak.  There's a neat little movie called 'The Smokers' about a group of teenage girls at a boarding school, coping with romance and boys for the first time. 

There's one scene where a girl is complaining to a guy about what she detests about being female. She says to him, "You don't know what it's like walking around with a gaping hole between your legs, waiting to be filled by the likes of you. Once you're inside, you have all the power."  

It IS about power, and it shouldn't have to be that way. We girls should be able to celebrate and enjoy every facet of our bodies. 

We shouldn't have to feel helpless and vulnerable because we have vaginas, or because we lack the strength to defend them.  Yet that's how Marks had made me feel. And I knew it would forever haunt me until I regained the upper hand, until I had the power over him. 

Having some guy beat him up or having him arrested wouldn't be good enough. I couldn't subcontract this to a cop or a boyfriend; I had to do the job myself.  I'd worked too hard at accepting my femininity to allow Marks such a victory.  Fortunately, I knew just what to do.  

The next day, I got up and went through my usual morning routine, put on a pretty dress, and made sure to place the item I needed in my purse. Then it was off to school, where Becky, Arleen, and Sue all expressed support for me and dismay over what had happened. Rumors were already circulating around the campus.  I aimed to set the story straight soon enough. 

 "Stephanie, you've got to report him to the principal or to the police," Arleen insisted. Becky and Sue seconded her opinion. I was pleased to see that Arleen had become a full-fledged member of our circle.  

"Principal Grogan?" I smiled with irony. "I don't think he's my best alternative. Besides, I've got a better answer. Wait for me in the senior lounge during the second period."  Guardedly, they said they'd wait.  The second period came, and I headed off to the lounge. The senior class had a separate 'club' with a stereo, soda machine, and such. 

One of the nice perks of being on top of the student pyramid. Most study halls found us in the lounge, reading, playing cards, etc. That was my destination today. I checked my purse to make sure my little item was ready. Then I took a deep breath, entered the lounge, and walked right up to Andy Marks.  He looked at me warily. "What do you want?"  

"The better question, Marks, is what do YOU want? I know the answer." I reached into my purse and pulled out my special item.  

A pair of my panties.  His eyes widened as I held them up for him to see.  "Do you remember these, Marks? I was wearing them last night  when you tried to rape me." I spoke in a firm voice. 

Every one of the thirty or so kids in the lounge had fallen silent as they turned to the two of us. You could have heard the proverbial pin drop.  Marks had a confused and uncertain expression on his face. And that something else was there too. I'd finally reasoned it out.  Envy.  Marks was jealous of me, and that was how I intended to defeat him. 

 "It took me a while to understand why you were so hateful to me, Marks. Always insulting and mocking me after I changed. At first, I just dismissed it as your usual assholic self; after all, you've caused a lot of misery around this place. But then I figured it out."  He continued to stare at me, mesmerized. So were all the other kids.  

"You see, Marks, you're afraid of me. Afraid of what I represent. You're scared GB could happen to you, too. You're afraid you might wake up with breasts on your chest or have to spend the rest of your life wearing panties like these."  I paused for effect, then continued. 

"But your fear isn't because you're scared of becoming a girl. What you're really afraid of is this: that you WANT to become a girl. That deep down inside that sewer you call a personality, there's a part of you that's jealous of me that I got to do what you didn't. 

That I turned into a female."  He was still frozen in place, shocked.  

"And because you don't have the guts to admit it to yourself that you want to be female, too, you took it out on me. Hence, you staged Rape-apalloza '03 last night."  

There were stunned gasps all around me.  "But you didn't have to go through all that, Marks," I said, shifting to a light, mocking tone. "Nobody's really sure how GB spreads. Maybe if you wear my panties, you'll get your wish. Maybe they'll turn you into the girl I know you're just dying to be. 

You didn't have to try to rape me; all you had to do was ask, and I would have given them to you. I know you want them, so here you go."  And with that, I tossed my pretty undies into his lap. He recoiled as if they were a pair of rattlesnakes.  

There's a moment in every track meet I've ever run that I call the 'turning'. It's when I'm racing next to an athlete and we're pushing each other to the limit. When I'm at my best, an instant will happen where both of us know I'm going to win. My will is stronger than my competitor's. 

Often, this can happen as early as the second lap of a race. Once 'the turning' occurs, the outcome is inevitable even if the fans don't know it until after we've crossed the finish line.  

Of course, I've been 'turned' too, when up against a better athlete. But not today. At that moment, I'd turned' Marks and we both knew it. I'd shown I was stronger than he, that I had the power. Elated, I felt the confidence, the belief in my femininity restored as I saw the look of anguish and shame cross his features. 

I steadily, relentlessly met his eyes, daring him to deny what I'd said.  He could not. With a strangled sob, utterly disgraced in front of our peers, he ran from the lounge.  To my amazement, I ran after him. I sensed it was not quite over. 

I found him in the hallway, leaning against a locker, tears running down his face.  

I can't say I felt compassion for him, not after all he had done. But I'd reached a point where I didn't want to add to his pain. At least, I'd forced him to confront his demon that couldn't help but make a difference. 

I walked up to him and stood there firmly, my arms folded under my breasts.  "How... how did you know?" he stammered.  

"It was obvious in hindsight, I guess."  "Once I heard you were going to be a girl, I... I found myself dreaming about what it would be like. I kept fantasizing about GB happening to me. I... I would obsess over it. 

And then you came to school as a female and... and you were so pretty and so feminine and seemed so happy! I just got more and more jealous. And I couldn't figure out why! I'd never wanted to be a girl before, but when it happened to you, it was all I could think about. And boys aren't ever supposed to want to be girls, so I got more scared that others would find out how I really felt, and I got angrier and angrier. I guess I... blamed you for making me feel this way." 

 "Chances are, Marks, you felt that way your whole life; you just never accepted it."  "I'm so sorry, Stephanie. I... I just lost control."  

"It's too late for apologies, Marks. But if you really want to make it better, then listen to me now. I've done my research. I know the transgendered are a peaceful, nonviolent lot. There's a darkness in you that has nothing to do with your sex. You've been hurting people for a long, long time. 

Even if you woke up tomorrow with a perfect girl's body, you'd still be a danger to yourself and those around you. You've got some serious issues you need to fix... fast. Get some help, Marks. If you want to make up for what you've done... get some goddamn help."  

Then I turned and walked away. I still couldn't stomach his presence; the image of being bound and stripped half-naked before him remained. But now I could balance it with the strength I'd been able to prove to both of us. And who knows, maybe he would get the therapy he so desperately needed. I wasn't betting the farm on it, but there was a chance.  

I gained high praise from everyone over my demolition of Andy Marks. It only took a couple of hours for the story to spread across the entire school, after whic, no one was taking him seriously. Even the various nerds and geeks he'd tormented were eager to challenge his twisted authority.  But it turned out not to be necessary. 

Marks and his partners-in-slime essentially disappeared from that day forward. They showed up for classes, but otherwise they avoided contact with all the other kids. And it was for sure that the other kids wanted nothing to do with them. In life, you reap what you sow. 

We'd all be graduating soon, and they'd have a fresh start somewhere else. Perhaps they'd learn their lesson and try to act like human beings. Perhaps.  

But in the meantime, things settled back to normal. I continued my intense workouts under Coach Bradford's guidance and accompanied the team to the various postseason title meets. Becky made it to the sectional race, the farthest she'd ever gotten. I cheered loudly for her and later, at the State championships, we all cheered as Hal finished third in the two-mile. 

And, for the first time in years, Milford had an athlete go all the way to the top. Big Mark Williams finished second in the shot put and won the state title in the discus. We were all giddy with delight for him.  

Of course, every silver lining has its cloud. Melody McCarthy won the championship in the girls' mile with a 4:50 that nearly matched my 4:49 from earlier in the season. 

I watched with more than a little resentment as she received her medal. From the stands, I locked eyes with her in a brief battle of wills. Grrrrr. I couldn't wait for our showdown at the National meet next week.  

During this time, I was moving deeper and deeper into my girlhood. I learned a whole new vocabulary: healing posts, scrunchies, applicators, clarifiers, and so much more.